I've been having such an amazing time lately rediscovering this thing called music - specifically, playing the piano. Something I've done very seriously since I was 5...almost 20 years of private lessons...highly classically trained...the main focus of all my upbringing...a huge part of who I am...played all the way through college and then stopped playing for awhile when I was working on my masters degree in music theory and just didn't have the time between all the research and paper writing (oh grad school, I do not miss you!). But what's awesome now is that I not only have the time to get back into it but I'm doing so in a totally different way and with an all new drive and passion that was missing all those years before. I always knew that God gave me a gift with music and it has always been such a deep part of me but have always wondered how He would use it, or even if He would since I got away from it for so long. I know now that He definitely intends to use it, I'm still not entirely sure how and what all that entails...but one thing I do know and it's that my piano playing and all of my musical pursuits are like everything else in my life: for Him. For worship. How I pour out in worship to Him...how He speaks to and inspires it in me...so, so much of that is through music. It's how He created me and it was no mistake, it was no waste! My musical giftings were not always for Him, since I did not always know Him (though He always knew me and He was always the author of the gifts), but He is redeeming them and redirecting them all for His purposes now as I give it all back to Him and press on to acknowledge Him! What could be more exciting or more fulfilling than that?!
So I had been pondering all of this and seeking Him for direction, and over the course of the past several weeks I got several confirmations that I was not only supposed to start playing again and explore it as a form of worship, but even to write new songs as He reveals to me. I've only been at it for several days but it's been amazing so far...His Presence has been so sweet and so strong...such holy moments. It's incredible because it's something I've always had inside of me, so it's familiar in a way but it's entirely fresh in the way that God is tapping into it and breathing His life and filling it with His Spirit. I can already tell I'll be cherishing those times of worship at the piano and am just so excited to see what God is going to stir up, all the ways He will speak and where it will all lead! Right now just soooo thankful that He is calling this out and using it to draw me even closer to Him. :) And ALL to His glory!!
I was blessed to play the piano in a wedding today, which turned out to be a wonderful and beautiful worship service. This is one of the songs we did...one of my absolute favorites!...and I can't think of a better way to describe what worshiping at the piano means for me than how the song itself puts it:
Your will above all else
My purpose remains
The art of losing myself
In bringing You praise
Oh that I would continue to just lose myself in Your Presence, Lord, as I worship You. Holy Spirit, consume me from the inside out!
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